(no subject)

[razorjak]

I'm a horror movie fan. That being said, I also admit that the horror genre has NEVER been seen as having much "upstairs" when it comes to brainpower. This has become increasingly true over the last quarter century. We're now at the point in which i CRINGE at most horror trailers and I wax nostalgically of days gone by when one would have to use two or three braincells at the theatre.

But this? This just scours out what little respect I had left for the genre. You'd think they couldn't do worse than the 174891748913 remake ( ie The Hills Have Eyes ) or blatant ripoff. But no, here is something that anally rapes them all and sends video of it to their mothers.

The Ring meets Fear(dot)com meets Darkness Falls meets The Grudge meets Final Destination meets ... well every fucking shitebucket that Hollywhoretown has produced in over a decade. On the plus side, it seems Malcolm in the Middle now has a movie he can be even more embarressed about than he is with Agent Cody Banks 2.

Comments

[medakse.livejournal.com]

but... but... it's filmed in New Orleans!
:)
or, as I told Anthony,
"well, they finally did it. It's a horror video game version of Jumanji"

[razorjak.livejournal.com]

I thought of that exact line about a minute after I posted this.

[medakse.livejournal.com]

We're now at the point in which i CRINGE at most horror trailers and I wax nostalgically of days gone by when one would have to use two or three braincells at the theatre.

Last excellent horror movie I saw was Below, and that came out some years back. You?

[razorjak.livejournal.com]

I loved Below. Though for some reason I kept thinking of the HP Lovecraft story in which the narrator believes he sees dolphins swimming alongside the sub he's in. Everyone else sees them as dead bodies.

Honestly, I can't remember the last good horror movie I've seen in theaters. Far too many have become nothing more than action movies with a slight tingle of horror. Which I hate.(*)

I've been loving the direct-to-video market lately. I guess it's a way of going back to my roots of low budget.

At the dawn of the VCR, direct-to-video was seen as the refuse that didn't merit a theatrical release. Nowadays, it's the last bastion of STORY-DRIVEN films that care more about the plot than the explosion count and "Ooh, is it not nifty" SFX.

Have you seen "Dead Birds" yet? Relatively low budget haunted house movie set in the civil war era starring a grown up Elliot from ET.

(*) One of the reasons I will always think games like Silent Hill and Fatal Frame are FAR superior to Resident Evil and the ilk.

[amish-ninja.livejournal.com]

I feel your pain, man. This makes Made For SciFi look good. Even a no-brainer like Silent Hill looks terrible.

[nimue-amethyst.livejournal.com]

Maybe this will cheer you up:

The LEGO Difference Engine (http://acarol.woz.org/).

[razorjak.livejournal.com]

I am building one of those once I have a few days to devote to it.

[jruske.livejournal.com]

Actually I thought it looked quite upbeat for the post-MTV ADD generation. Though it would have to have a twist ending - like it turns out they were in a VR playing the game - in order for it to rip off the Korean genre as well as the Hong Kong studios.

Now if these bastards would read some Lovecraft and start making knockoffs of his ideas - that would be sweet.

that would be sweet.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

No.It.Wouldn't.:(

[jruske.livejournal.com]

Oh come on now... aren't you tired of pulp zombies and pulp vampires and pulp werewolves? Haven't we seen enough fat bald ugly clowns and psychotic women in bunny suits?

It's time for shoggoths and hounds, dagon and deep ones, etc. At least give me some semblence of something other than diseased humans. And so they will destroy the material. Boo hoo. It will ride the resurgence of interest (if you haven't noticed there are loads of new anthologies out lately in the genre) and could actually provide the same kind of lip smacking goodness that came from seeing the rather well rendered CoC rip offs in In The Mouth Of Madness when you finally see the legion of beasts coming into power.

Besides they already made the Brothers Grimm all cuddly. If they do the same for HP Lovecraft then I'm pretty sure a darker version will follow.

[(Anonymous)]

Three words:Die,Monster,Die.

Die,monster,die.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

That was me,thought I was logged in,sorry.

[razorjak.livejournal.com]

There have been worse. Much worse.

[jruske.livejournal.com]

No. Why?

[jruske.livejournal.com]

And this is different from how they handle all writing?

I mean, I'd say I'd lower my expectations but to set the bar any lower is to start being greatful for Bollywood.

Yes they would do a bad job with the material. But it would be something slightly different than the continual spew currently in circulation. And slightly different may be worse, but it is different as Arbys likes to say.

[jruske.livejournal.com]

A cat turd is different than a dog turd but I wouldn't want to eat either one.

Certainly a fair comparison between McDonalds and Arbys.

Thanks for the list. I probably have only seen half of these. I wonder how many I can grab.

[stardragonca.livejournal.com]

Just because it would be different doesn't mean it would be worth doing. A cat turd is different than a dog turd but I wouldn't want to eat either one
IAWTC.
Three words:Starship Troopers II

[razorjak.livejournal.com]

Wow, I thought I was the only one who saw that steamer.

Funny thing, I liked the CGI series (Roughnecks: the Starship Troopers Chronicles) that BKN put out awhile ago.

[dj-doc.livejournal.com]

The Ring meets Fear(dot)com meets Darkness Falls meets The Grudge meets Final Destination meets ...

Damn I thought you were talking about "Scary Movie 4" now I'm disappointed :-(