![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
Jan. 14th, 2006 06:53 pm
(no subject)
I love my friends.
I really do.
I really do.
Jan. 14th, 2006
Jan. 14th, 2006 10:10 pm
Less painful hobbies ...
460 pages into INCUBUS DREAMS, the latest Anita Blake book in paperback.
SWEET WHORE OF BABYLON! Is there anyone who can deny that Laurell K. Hamilton is the Patron Saint of Mary Sues?(1) Not only that, but the grandmistress of Monty Haulism?
Fucking hell! I so need a less painful hobby than trying to sift through the tripe she spews forth onto the pages.
Masturbation with 40 grit sandpaper using icyhot as lubricant while sodomizing myself with a dildo made of dry ice. Yeah, that'll be a less painful pasttime. At least then it'd be me and me alone causing my pain. Oprah calls that empowerment.
Of the 460 pages I've read, probably 425 of them have been about Anita fucking everyone on the planet except the one who seems the most devoted to her. 25 pages of explaining why she can't make love to Nathaniel. And maybe 10 pages of non-sex related paranormal shit.
And no Edward in sight!
I truly hate this series now. But I can't stop reading them because she DOES write about bouncers and bodyguards TRULY well. That is, when she's not describing Anita's latest fuckfest; or her pathetic mewling whining about it afterwards.
At least with her Meredith Gentry books, they started off as bad lowgrade porn. I was able to toss the series after the first book. But the wench started the Anita Blake series off decently. And then she went Anne Rice/Jeann Auel on us and turned a decent series into little more than a collection of "romance" novels surrounded by an ever weakening veneer of spookiness.
(1) Anita Blake is Hamilton's Mary Sue. She's her own "perfect image". And she's fallen into the Monty Haul trap of giving her marysue so much power so quickly that she really has no idea what to throw at her next. She might as well have the next power plateau cause her to produce a glowing aura and have her hair whip up into the air, golden blonde.
SWEET WHORE OF BABYLON! Is there anyone who can deny that Laurell K. Hamilton is the Patron Saint of Mary Sues?(1) Not only that, but the grandmistress of Monty Haulism?
Fucking hell! I so need a less painful hobby than trying to sift through the tripe she spews forth onto the pages.
Masturbation with 40 grit sandpaper using icyhot as lubricant while sodomizing myself with a dildo made of dry ice. Yeah, that'll be a less painful pasttime. At least then it'd be me and me alone causing my pain. Oprah calls that empowerment.
Of the 460 pages I've read, probably 425 of them have been about Anita fucking everyone on the planet except the one who seems the most devoted to her. 25 pages of explaining why she can't make love to Nathaniel. And maybe 10 pages of non-sex related paranormal shit.
And no Edward in sight!
I truly hate this series now. But I can't stop reading them because she DOES write about bouncers and bodyguards TRULY well. That is, when she's not describing Anita's latest fuckfest; or her pathetic mewling whining about it afterwards.
At least with her Meredith Gentry books, they started off as bad lowgrade porn. I was able to toss the series after the first book. But the wench started the Anita Blake series off decently. And then she went Anne Rice/Jeann Auel on us and turned a decent series into little more than a collection of "romance" novels surrounded by an ever weakening veneer of spookiness.
(1) Anita Blake is Hamilton's Mary Sue. She's her own "perfect image". And she's fallen into the Monty Haul trap of giving her marysue so much power so quickly that she really has no idea what to throw at her next. She might as well have the next power plateau cause her to produce a glowing aura and have her hair whip up into the air, golden blonde.
